Shoveling snow!

Since our 'snowmaggeden' we have supposedly experienced, J has been shovelling the snow as his superintendent duties. He would come home to a drive way loaded with snow, sigh and grab the shovel in acceptance. The first time he shovelled, I quickly jumped inside to keep myself warm. After an hour by myself, bored as heck.. I decided to go out there to entertain myself. I quickly finished a few minutes afterwards.
A couple of days later, as snow was falling to the ground, J took the shovel once again. I decided to stay outside with him while I smoked my cigerette and do what I do best: supervise! I could tell it was heavy work as he huffed and puffed, pushing, lifting this 1 day old heavy snow across the drive way. As courtesy, I decided to offer help and of course, he took it. After 10 mins, I couldn't take it anymore so he took over. I knew shovelling snow was hard work but not as I hard as I thought it would be!

J shovelling snow while I kept him entertained

Yesterday, (after yet another snowfall) the snow once again returned. The boys were too much in a rush to get to their superbowl party to shovel any snow. As I returned to home, the driveway was packed with snow. My friend, C, and I had organized a homework day to work on our projects. I knew she would be wearing heels (we planned to do a photoshoot) so I didn't want her to slip and slide down to her skinny and fragile knees. I decided to shovel the snow.
Let me tell you, it was friggin' hard work! Thankfully to Body Break, they gave tips on how to properly shovel snow without breaking your back and straining your body.
I took the tips. After an hour, I could feel my legs burning. My shoulders felt like I was doing pure weight lifts.

It felt like I came back from the gym

Because I couldn't make it to the gym during the weekend, I thought that this was a good source of exercie.. and it's only outside of my house!
I wanted to really see how much snow shovelling would work as a workout. I found many sources indicating that shovelling snow is a really good source of cardio and weight training!

Only 15 mins of snow shovelling counts as moderate physical activity!

Can you say score!!! Just imagine, I shovelled snow for more than hour!

Warning: many sources have also mentioned that snow shovelling is the cause of heart attacks. Yep! Because of the sudden cold air the body emerges itself in, one's heart rate can be greatly increased in a short period of time. Your breathing can be shortened, adding strain to your body.
Not to worry! Below are tips on how to avoid such problems:

• If you have heart or back problems, shovelling snow is def not for you!
• Like any other work out, warming up, stretching, and cooling down is neccessary!
• If you need to, take breaks!
• Remember, lift with your legs (like doing lunges and squats. Imagine your shovel as weights); concentrate on your shoulders and back when throwing snow (and biceps, triceps will follow!)
• do not twist while throwing snow. Throw snow in front of you. This is how many people can strain their backs
• dress warmly! I usually bundle up but end up taking a layer off through half of it! (gloves are very neccessary!)
• break up ice with your legs. Well this one is my persoanl tip to you. J uses his arms to do so because he has strong muscles. For me, I use my legs to go real deep!
• Push, not lift snow across. I usually push the snow across the driveway to one pile (or one row) then throw it on the lawn. I'd repeat for all rows.
• I lift with as much snow as I can. Don't over do it.

I think I'm the only one looking forward to shovelling snow. Regardless, if you can't make it to the gym that day, shovel snow... and if you're really good at it, you can also start a business! lol

heart facts

When I made the dedication to take charge of my own body a few years ago, I consulted my bf (who, back then was actually sexy and fit) about some exercise tips. (Mind you, I used to be a size 1-2 when I was back in highschool so working out for me was new when I gained weight. ) He indicated that the most important thing I could do is to monitor my heart rate. Increasing your heart rate will determine the intensity of your work out, to determine if what you're actually doing will affect your body in a healthy way.
Of course, I took this piece of information very.. heartedly (LOL) and used it as a guideline for my workouts. As you may know, there are different zones of heart rate:

Above is a chart of where your heart rate is supposed to be. Personally, I try to aim for the cardiovascular performance because I'm burning as many calories as I can as well as increasing the strength of my lungs and heart.

I have to admit though, I am a smoker and if you're a smoker, don't be discouraged from achieving these heart rates. Even though I am a smoker, I find that I can still breathe as well as other non-smokers but I am working more than them as well. And because I am a smoker, my endurance is short lived than those of non smokers - another reason why I try to stay in this zone. Anything higher or anything lower will not benefit my body.

Something quite interesting happened yesterday when I was on the elyptical : I usually put my iphone on house, reggae or soca while doing my cardio. Yesterday I put it on shuffle. I've noticed that my heart rate significantly dropped when I was listening to slower songs even though I'm going the same pace and intensity. I shared this experience with J, he mentioned that that's why I should always focus on what I'm doing. He has always stressed the fact that some people merely focus on their exercise and are just moving their legs, thus not getting anything from their workout. He said that even though you're at the same intensity with a slower song than a faster song, your mind and body works the together.
I thought this was quite interesting and looked up how music can affect one's heart rate. This morning, I googled "heart rate music affects." I've found that many sources have mentioned that universities concluded the tempo of your music greatly affects your heart rate. The most interesting part is that the perference or type of music chosen doesn't affect it at all; it's the tempo and beat that does.

Just thought I'd share this with you because... well, I find it quite interesting. You can control your heart rate by the type of music you choose while working out :)

Number 5

This is my second last term of my program =S and yes, I am scared. Next semester, I'll be off to internship for half of it and hopefully I'll stabilize myself with a full time job. I'm in desperate need of a full time... especially because I owe J 5 years of financial support lol
Right now, I'm getting ahead of myself...Let me start with this:

In semester 5 (my current semester), I have a class that is dedicated to my portfolio. I'm quite grateful that I have someone that can guide me through this process. Unlike other programs, I find that they don't quite help students individually to develop and present this piece of yourself to potential employers.
Last week, I showed all of my good stuff to my coordinator. She liked most of it but gave me two assignments I can work on: an interactive magazine (SURFACE magazine will be the one I'll be redesigning) and a photography poster (a poster that I have something in mind).
Currently, I think I just "discovered" my personal logo. I think it's very me (the colours I chose) but most importantly, I think it works well artistically and conceptually.
We had to display our logo concepts for class critique. I have to admit, I think mine looks the best because of the concept I had in mind. Other girls did the usual flowers and cursive shit... and while the guys did the usual whateverness. With mine, I think it's... clever. Exactly what I want to show to my potential employers.
I'm also currently designing my personal stationary, business card and envelope. My stationary will involve my resume... I brought my laptop to work to work on it and I have to admit, today is the day my creative juices are finally flowing!!! (hopefully I don't lose it after I'm done typing this)
On top of that, I'm currently doing a flash website... something I'm gonna struggle with but hopefully it won't be too frustrating.
Other projects I'm currently working on are:

• ad campaign for zipcar - 3 billboard concepts, a mail-in flyer and a catalogue
• distillery district re-id - a logo, wayfinding, and poster

The logo for the distillery district was a bit hard for me to come up with... especially because the current one truly characterizes the district anyway.

So far, i'm very much enjoying the projects we're working on. I think this is what I've been waiting for for the past 2 years.

TRX Circuit

I get really bored of the same routines. I find that my motivation is in the challenge of my physical ability. If I find myself yawning in a class, that's when I know I gotta try something new.
The cousin and I have made a pact with eachother that we should be involved in a sport or physical activity every summer. (Mostly in the summer because that's when I have the most free time but hopefully when I start working FT, it'll change) Last summer was kickboxing and hot yoga. On top of that, the cousin would also attend combat classes at goodlife (what a trooper!) This summer we are planning to do boot camp. Hopefully the trial period we're planning to do will be challenging enough for us and HOPEFULLY price will be good too!
I actually found another place we can and hopefully will challenge physcial and mental strength:

TRX Suspension Trainer

Yep, it's basically a resistance band suspended from a door frame or the ceiling. It uses the traditional fitness techniques but caters to the band. You use your body weight for weight training but can incorporate circuits to combine the ultimate weight training and cardio combo in one. I'd really like to try it but since the equipment is limited in Toronto gyms, I can only hope it will go up to North York! =S

Nonetheless, if you're interested, here's the link.

A new beginning.... again?

Earlier this month, I've noticed that I've been getting pretty chunky lately. Not unusual of course because of my eating habits but the more and more I look at myself in the mirror, the more and more I am quite dissatisfied with how my body looks. This sort of emotion has furthered dissatisfaction yesterday. I went to Fairview to look for something to wear on tonight for my sister's 30th birthday.

We are going for dinner at a Winterlicious Chinese restaurant, then heading to a party called the Shuffle Party. I'm quite excited because this party happens for only once a month... and the music is friggin' crazy! Imagine... putting your ipod on shuffle... at a club!!!

As I was trying on things, I've noticed that this huge piece of miztran fat has been juking out of everything I tried! My spare tire has definately inflated over the past months of non exercise.
With this dissatisfaction, there is always a solution - eating healthy and working out. Just like over the summer when the cousin, Katie and I used to go to kickboxing and hot yoga religiously, I think I'm def gonna do the same routine.
Earlier this year, I started blogging again about my out lifestyle change. It changed for a bit, I def got slimmer, gained some visible muscles and lost about 5lbs. It was pretty amazing how hot I kind of looked without my rolls. But nonetheless, I am trying to stick with it every day.

Losing weight is 20% exercise & 80% nutrition!

Monday, I went to the supermarket to look for some healthy lunches for school and work. Not only do I save a hell lot of money, I also really benefit from eating my usual salad with almonds and cashews (no salad dressing!), tamatoes, and cucumbers. I pack either a wrap or whole grain sandwich filled with my favorite deli meats & cheese - hot mortadella, lean smoked turkey and jalapeno style harvati or spicy monteray jack (no mayo, of course!). I find that adding a kick to my sandwich doesn't make it dry nor dissatisfying.
I had this ingenious idea of using filling my sandwich with lots of my spring mix salad, tomatoes and cucumbers. I just compile my veggies and sandwich right before I eat.
To tell you the truth, I am quite happy with what I have for lunch everyday and look forward to eating it.
Now that lunch is covered, I just gotta think of convenient type foods that I can eat for breakfast. My dilemma is that, well I'm always on the go. It usually takes me 30mins to get ready and once I'm done visually prepping for the day, I head out as quickly as I can.

Researchers have found that those who eat a large breakfast every day are more likely to lose weight

I want something that I can eat while driving (and even though dangerous), it is the quickest solution I can think of.

Eating breakfast an hour within you wake up is highly recommended for those who want to lose weight



[ I got a break through just now!!!! lol ]

This morning, J blended me a hearty strawberry, banana shake filled with flax seed and orange juice. I think I'm gonna have J's delicious fruit shake every morning for breakfast! That's perfect, right!!!?? It fills me up quite perfectly, made from real fruits, tastes good AND probably covers my fruit and veggie daily recommended intake every day! Not to mention, it's friggin' convenient!

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As for my exercise routine, I've decided to weight train at least twice a week and cardio four five times a week (if time permits). Weekends are my off days where I can do homework. This will be work out schedule (if you're curious):

Monday: Combat/Cardio
Tuesday: Pump & Cardio
Wednesday: Cardio
Thursday: Pump & Combat
Friday: Cardio

I'm not sure if I want to get into hot yoga again. The reason why I stopped going was because 1. the owners decided to cut the cheap class and 2. it wasn't challenging enough. Maybe I can look relook the schedule to see if I can do it Fridays again? But one thing is for sure: it'll be challenging once again.

Another thing, the cousin and I have bought vouchers to a kickboxing gym. It was $20 for 20 classes! Fucken amazing! I hope we get to start this once again! I'm thinking that we should start going either in March or Feb, and go once a week.

Honestly, I love working out. The love hate eating healthy but hey, that's sacrifice for ya!

Where do I stand?

I've been feeling a little under the weather lately... not physically, but emotionally. Since my trip to Xmas, I've been feeling a bit unappreciated. I find myself reclusive from social events. I thought it was stress from school and perhaps the decline of employment but I find that my social circle isn't there anymore.
I find that I have to make plans with people while they don't bother doing the same for me. It questions the utter friendship we have together. I find myself analyzing if it's worth it.
Last Friday, I was very furious at a certain friend - or so I thought he was. The sequence of events of the night made me question if anyone actually considers how I feel sometimes? I have to admit that, I have conformed to this robot of a friend who is passive etc. That is due to the fact that I don't want to emerge any conflicts between J and his guy friends.
To elaborate -- last week, J, JR, and R asked me if I wanted to go to the casino on Friday night. Not having any plans (and despite that I don't gamble) I decided to take on that offer. Mostly because I haven't spent some good ol' quality time with the guys out. (I couldn't care less of the gambling) R is not a big gambler himself so we decided to bring $40 each and combine our fortunes to hopefully make a profit. I was quite excited as everything was going very smoothly -- or so I thought.
An hour before we were supposed to head out... and right when I got into the car from the taking out cash for the night, J asked me, "How would you feel if it was a guy's night out?"
I felt fucken furious when I heard that. Fucken Furious.
Apparently S wanted a guys night out at the very fucken last minute.
Let's recount -- I was the only girl going.
Do you see something wrong here?
Not only was I de-invited to this fucken shot gun 'guys night out,' J didn't even stand up for me. He wouldn't even look at it in my view and MAYBE suggested to the guys that

1. it was friggin' 10pm at night and I had not plans but to go chill with them
2. it wasn't apparent enough for him to stand up to his friends and say, 'hey, maybe it would be inappropriate to pull this because she's the ONLY girl going?'

The lack of actions I've experienced from J made me really question the relationship we have together. The fact that he didn't quite consider my feeling in this whole ordeal was something to ponder.
I've never, ever, asked him to choose me over his friends but I find that there is this constant battle between me and his friends --- and I'm certainly not the one who starts it. I feel that he doesn't realize this. Whenever this emerges, I feel that he's always choosing them over me.
With this in mind, I feel like he's actually not considering how I feel in the scheme of things.
The pressure of our big 5 is coming up and I feel that things have been quite different. Because of this thing, I question if this is the battle I have to endure through out my future with him? If so, I'm not up to it.

A few weekends ago, I was chilling with JR one Sunday night after the guys left. R came over... and randomly asked, "If J asked you to marry him now, would you?" I tried to avoid answering and replied with a joke. He looked at me seriously.
"I don't know," I replied.
"You don't know?" He looked astonished, confused, surprised - not expecting this uncertain answer from me.
It's true. I really don't know if I really want to committ to someone who has friends that make him choose between me and them. I don't want to go through this constant battle of attention throughout my life.

The day after the casino night, I told JR how I felt towards S proposing this shot gun 'guys night out.' He said to me that he didn't even consider my aspect, or I felt. I was truly blessed to hear the truth from him.
He argued that the only reason why S proposed this was because he didn't want his gf to go. My reply?
"How is this my problem? Why did I have to be so called punished for this shit? Something that doesn't involve me? and yes, it did involve me indirectly... but why didn't HE consult me first?"
To me, that just showed that NONE of the guys AND my BF didn't even consider how I effin' felt.
This, in itself infuriated me.

Lately, I've been feeling this sort of anger towards J. He said that next time, he would consider how I felt in situations like this.... but for some sort of reason, I don't believe him.

In turn, I think this would be the demise of our relationship.

Merry (belated) Xmas?

My cousin's blog kind of motivated me to blog about this... and heck.. as all of my blogs go, It's pretty much about how I'm feeling at this current moment and the thoughts that are going be streaming out of my mind...

side note: if i don't make sense, I don't really care. Figure it out lol

I guess i'll start with my xmas...

My family doesn't celebrate xmas. Nope, we used to have a tree when i was younger but my mom decided to not have it anymore because no one would initate to bring it down... and to tell you the truth, we are just a bunch of lazy viet ppl who don't really care. ever since then, we haven't celebrated xmas.
On friday after working, I went over to Joo's place. I little depressed the whole day because my friend was invited to this annual xmas eve party... but i wasn't. I was lil' embarrassed because the host actually called me out about it and told me not to be foolish so of course, (because by default) i was invited. whatever. i'll leave that behind me.
Our family's (j's fam) don't quite celebrate xmas so we (I) decided that we should just go out for dinner just the two of us. We ended up going to the Keg (not our first choice but everything was closed) and had a steak dinner. It was pleasant because we rarely get to out by ourselves on such a special occasion :)
After we ordered, I surprised him with his gift. He was utterly surprised that I got him what he wanted for so long (because I'm also utterly broke). he was grateful for it ... and i'm grateful that I gave it to him.
During the course of our dinner, I am still amazed that we can still carry on our silly conversations after so many years. It felt quite nice.
On xmas day, I really had nothing to do. I knew everyone had plans so I decided to dedicate that day to sleeping in and cleaning my (hurricaned) room. Yes, Re and cousin, you guys would be proud of me!!! It is quite clean and organized! Hopefully it will last when you guys can come over to witness this!! lol
I also did my nails, cleaned my washroom took a shower then headed over to j's parents house to spend some time with him and his fam. Even though I got there around midnight, it was pleasant to see J and his fam happy to just watch transformers from tv. We didn't stay long after that.
The next day, I was dragged to the mall by my younger sisters to go boxing day shopping. I guess they're at that age where they need to go boxing day shopping. regardless, it was fun and pleasant... tiring but spent some good quality time with my sisters.

I didn't really do much during my break. (I didn't know I had the Monday AND Tuesday off until the Thursday before lol so I didn't plan anything)

As I was reading my cousin's blog entry about her xmas break... I kind of felt the same way. Yes, I did. That lonely, no plans type of thing. That very day, I thought to myself what if J was no longer in my life. What back up plans should I consider to doing instead of sulking around and thinking about this and that?
I then thought about my sisters and family.
So i'm proposing to you cousin, that if you ever feel lonely regardless of the day, please do not hesitate to call me. I always look forward to seeing you and even though sometimes our schedules do not correspond, we eventually always make it correspond. So next year on xmas day or xmas eve or even boxing day - or whenever you do feel lonely - don't be. I am more than glad to spend your lonely day with you :)

Another note, (I'm not sure if i should disclose this on my blog but i'm going to do it anyway) I've been invited to a party next month in which I do not want to go. I think after this party and this whole thing that is causing this party, I've decided leave our friendship behind. When I say behind, I mean behind in 2010. 2011 will be a new year and fresh decade to start with (which reminds me that i will have to do another 2010 flashback posting and a 2011 resolution posting.. maybe tmr?) I think our friendship has seen its strains. Our common interests are slowly fading and I find myself kind of dreading to see you. I'm sorry to say this but I really don't know what to do?